1. There's nothing quite like the feeling of lying on an operating table with doctors all around you and hearing a cry that sends shockwaves of relief through you, releasing all of the worries you were too afraid to articulate with anything other than silent, one-word prayers. Hearing "it's a girl" immediately after made up for all nine months of misery and all seven days of labor pains.
2. Being pregnant, having a C-section, and nursing an infant are completely different experiences when one is a law student than when one is a stay at home mom. I don't regret finishing school, but neither do I regret putting my career on hold to be home right now. Everything is easier and I feel about a hundred times more confident as a mom this time around.
3. Speaking of this time around, the second baby is so much easier. I'm not afraid she will break her neck, dehydrate because I'm not making enough milk, or spontaneously combust. They brought her to me in the recovery room so she could nurse. She latched on immediately and we've been inseparable since.
4. I thought Henry would freak out and be severely emotionally scarred by the birth of his sister. It turns out he ignores her 99% of the time and occasionally gives her a loving and gentle pat on the foot. "Baby Stella" gets talked about while he is playing with his toys, along with Henry, Mercy, and of course Lightning McQueen.
5. I'm still terrified about the prospect of raising a daughter, but I think with Greg's help we are up to the challenge.
7. I lost all of the pregnancy weight and maybe more. I'm glad that more weight gain is not a problem with this pregnancy, but I also know the journey I started before I got pregnant is not nearly over. Also the extremely quick weight loss the last couple of days was a little freaky and I'll be glad when I know what's going on with my body again.
6. Greg is sleeping. A lot. I think the last few weeks were difficult for him, maybe even more so than me. Waiting and waiting and worrying about your wife and baby for days and days on end can take a toll. I am not nearly as tired as I was when 9 months pregnant. Greg is perpetually exhausted.
7. I feel the urge to write now more than ever. Part of me wishes I could have finished a draft before Stella was born, just to be super productive. Looking at my two kids and thinking about paying the bills just makes the urge more urgent. :)
8. The baby. Is quieter than Henry was. When we brought him home we ended up putting him in his crib to sleep right away because he was just such a noisy sleeper. Stella sleeps with us all night, just moving around a little when she wants to eat. Right now she eats three or four times at night but I can usually sleep while she's eating and only really wake up to put her on and off or if she needs to be changed. Sometimes I wake Greg up to help me but I don't always need to.
She squeaks when she cries or when she has the hiccups, and we call her Squeaker or Pipsqueak.
She eats a lot. Like constantly. She is not on any sort of schedule yet, but she eats much longer than the 45 minutes that everyone says, then sleeps for 3 or 4 hours at a time during the day and night. She is starting to open her eyes more and look around, mostly at lights. I was holding her today and talking to her and I swear she looked at me and broke out into a huge smile. I thought I was going crazy because it's way to early for her to smile, but then my mom came down and was holding her and she did it again! She has a beautiful smile, even if it's really just gas :)
If I hold her upright on my shoulder she lifts and turns her head.
We go to her doctor tomorrow to see how much weight she's regained. We are also going to my doctor to get my staples removed. Even if everything feels the same, not having Frankenstein-esqe metal staples across my stomach will be nice.
9. I don't have some incredible surge of emotion or crazy "bond" like moms talk about having with their newborns. I didn't have it with Henry either. I'm just really really happy that we are safe and healthy and I'm trying to enjoy each day for what it is. It would be easy to wish away this time recovering from surgery, but I'm trying to remember that Stella will only be this tiny for a very short time. I can't believe she'll be a week old tomorrow!
