Public Breastfeeding

As some of you may know, I stopped breastfeeding Henry almost a month ago. I loved the experience of breastfeeding and had originally intended to continue for a year at least. Unfortunately I was one of those rare women who actually had a supply problem, not to mention the difficulty of pumping on a schedule with a two-hour train commute to school. I'm hoping that the next time it will work out better.

Even though I'm no longer feeding with the breast, the topic is still interesting to me, especially since it seems to be so heated among moms. Whether to do it or not, how long to do it, and now where to do it all of a sudden seem to be these huge controversies.

Here is a post I read today and my response, which hasn't been published yet.

This is a post for Christian mothers or parents. Ever since I had a child I have become more aware of what has been going on in the "motherhood" community. I've learned a lot of wonderful things concerning cloth diapering, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, homeschooling, and many other things. However, I've also come across a lot of different things that sort of incense me. Perhaps you have noticed as well and agree with me. Perhaps you don't agree with me. But I've been thinking a lot lately on a specific subject and since I am able to speak my mind on my blog, I'm going to. I want to talk about nursing in public. It is such a hot topic now days because of the controversy. I believe breastfeeding is the best way to nourish your child. I believe God created our bodies so that we could take care of our children the best way we can. I am all for spreading awareness and all for it becoming more accepted. I am not, however, all for women doing so in public with no discretion whatsoever. This to me is not an issue of Rights. It is an issue of Modesty, and an issue of God's Standards. When I recently shared my views about nursing in public discretely, I was told that just because I was comfortable nursing "modestly" did not mean everyone else had to. I was told that my "standard" of modesty was not the same as others and should not be held to others. I was absolutely flabbergasted, because I had stated that as a Christian, I could not justify nursing in public and being immodest in so doing. It isn't My standard. It's God's standard. My standard of modesty means nothing if it isn't aligned with God's standards. God's standards are perfect and all are subject to them. I know that this is sometimes debated, whether those who aren't Christians are held to the same standards, but consider the book of Jonah. Jonah was sent by God to Nineveh to preach to them and call them to repent or God would destroy the nation. This nation was not a nation which followed God. They worshiped their own gods and all in all they were extremely immoral. And yet God held them to His standards, even if they did not worship Him. Just because they worshiped some other gods did not make them immune to the God of Heaven's standards. God's standards encompass all. 2 Corinthians 5:10 says we will ALL stand at the judgment seat of Christ. "For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad." Consider this passage concerning God's standards for us women: To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:5 We are to be discreet, which means to show good judgment, and chaste, which means to be morally pure in thought and act - also meaning modest. While I do support breastfeeding and stand behind any woman who chooses to nourish her child in this way, I do believe that God's standards even encompass nursing mothers and we should all make sure we are doing so in a manner that is pleasing to God. So many people also say that it is impossible to modestly nurse a child in public, but I disagree. I nursed Benjamin for a little over 12 months (he's just been weened this week - which is very emotional for me so I'm not going to talk about that) and I have never flashed anyone while doing so! And Benjamin is even one of those children who won't keep a blanket over him. It's possible, with practice. Next time you start getting worked up about your "rights" as a nursing mother, think about God's standards and whether or not your "rights" fall under His standards. As I usually say when posting a 'spiritual post', you might not agree with me. But this is what I believe.

My response:

I agree that modesty is something that God desires for men and women. I think the problem that some might have with this is that modesty has been and always will be defined by culture. In this case, when you talk about God's standards what you are really saying is our society's cultural standards for what is modest. Even today in the US there are subcultures of society where modesty can mean keeping your wrists covered, covering your hair, not wearing pants (for women), or just wearing a one-piece swimsuit to the beach. In some parts of the world it would be immodest to have any part of your legs exposed, but being totally topless is considered normal.

Personally I was never comfortable enough to breastfeed in public and was even uncomfortable when people visited me during feedings in the hospital! That said, I think that if some women feel comfortable breastfeeding in public, even without a blanket over the child's head, then it doesn't necessarily imply that they are rebelling against God's command to be modest. Perhaps these women even want to change the societal standard for modesty so that their public breastfeeding is accepted and eventually ignored. I guess I just don't see why this is a spiritual issue.

There are many issues debated today that I think God has given us clear commands about, I just don't think this is one of them. If you believe God wants you to cover up, then certainly cover up! But we have to be careful about judging the motives of other women, especially when generalizing. For example, I came to a place where I knew the Lord wanted me to stop taking the pill. I don't think birth control is wrong at all, I was on it for the first year and a half of my marriage, and I don't have any problem with anyone else who chooses to be on it. However I knew for sure that the Lord wanted me to stop, and because I obeyed that command I now have a beautiful son.

I think sin is more than just a laundry list of rules we extract from the Bible. It is also about listening and obeying the Holy Spirit and following God's will for our lives. I constantly have to remind myself that His will for me is not always the same as His will for another woman.